Another Day, Another Thing Ruined

image via amazon.com

Ode to my whistling teapot:

You sat on my stove
So shiny and black
You whistled so sweetly
And never talked back


Til one day I asked you
To boil water hot
And I couldn't hear your whistle
My poor black tea pot


Then from the kitchen
There came a smell
I bounded up the stairs,
and yelled, "Oh hell!"


I'd left you on "hot"
til the water was gone
And now you're dead
my shiny tea pot.


Damn it.


Here is my teapot, forever immortalized on Good Morning America:

Just How "From Scratch" Are We Talking?

image credit: pressurechief_redux on Flickr

If you're wondering if this blog is going to help you, ask yourself two questions:

1. Do you base your success on whether or not something is edible?
2. Do you find most recipes to be confusing?

If you answer 'yes' to those, either or both, then yeah, this blog will help you. A little background -- my friends literally did gauge my cooking progress by how long it had been since I'd burned something... and it was a good gauge, to be honest.

We used to spend around $800 a month on food for the two of us, at Super Wal-Mart in Georgia. Because honestly, I had no idea what I was doing, bought almost all prepackaged foods and ingredients, because the idea of cooking even a premade meal was kind of daunting. I made nothing from scratch.

My parents bought me a book when I first got married called 'Help! My Apartment Has a Kitchen' which claimed to have "foolproof" recipes. They are basic. I'm talking, instructions on how to do a baked potato. Sad thing? I needed those directions, and referred to them frequently. But amongst those simple instructions were also recipes that I feel were a little too advanced for the target audience, and that there were some basics, like chopping an onion, that were overlooked. It seems like common sense, but to someone who's never done it, it can be daunting... and when you cut an onion wrong, it can make you cry -- literally. So, that's where I'm starting. The SUPER basics. I'll mix in recipes and other things along the way, but I'll make sure that I'm not overlooking people who start where I did.

I do shop healthy. Well, not as healthy as some, but the Standard American Diet (SAD) is frightening to me. If something comes up where I am talking about specific ingredients I avoid, brands, or whatnot, I'll mention why, but in general, that's going to be your own preference -- no lectures, I swear.

Please feel free to ask questions, give friendly advice, or make suggestions along the way as well!